Her Death
by MissFiyerabaMeponineSherlock
Summary: She sees the musket aimed at him. He does not care. She knows that the National Guardsman is about to kill him. He does not care. She cannot let him die, just as she cannot live without him. M/É


**Time for something depressing, though anyone who has read my stories before should know to expect this :P Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Les Misérables.**

She sees the musket aimed at him. He does not care. She knows that the National Guardsman is about to kill him. He does not care. She cannot let him die, just as she cannot live without him. She needs him to live more than she needs to breathe. He is her life; her sun; her light in the dark; her fire in the midst of the harsh winter; her raison d'être. She loves him, yes. Éponine Thénardier loves Marius Pontmercy with all of her heart; with all that she is. So no, she cannot live without him. So strong is her love that she would, if he died, die of a broken heart. She could not see any reason to live in a world without Marius Pontmercy. He is her best friend and the only person that cares about her. She loves him, but he does not love her. No, he loves a girl by the name of Cosette, a girl that he has only met once. It pains Éponine to know this, but there is nothing she can do. He does not love her! Alas! But that will not stop her from loving him with every fiber of her being. And so, as she sees the musket aimed at him, there is only one thought in her mind: she cannot let him die.

She jumps forward, grabbing the muzzle of the musket and guiding it over to herself. She takes the shot that would surely have killed Marius, thus saving his life. The bullet passes through her hand and enters her chest. She can't help but cry out. The pain she feels as the bullet tears through her flesh is agonizing. Words cannot describe the pain she feels. She stumbles back, falling down from the barricade. She knows that she is dying. She regrets nothing. She drags herself into the shadows. She is hidden from the students that continue to fight. No one sees her, no one picks her up, no one helps her. Éponine Thénardier will not be saved. She will die. She watches, making sure not to cry out, as the barricade is very nearly taken, she watches as Marius threatens to blow up the barricade, and she watches as the National Guard falls back. This fight has been won, but the battle is far from over. Then Éponine sees her chance and as Marius walks by her, she calls out to him.

"Monsieur Marius!" her voice is weak, no more than a breath. Marius pauses and looks around, but does not see her there, concealed by the shadows. He continues to walk, thinking that maybe he is mistaken. Éponine repeats: "Monsieur Marius!" He cannot doubt, now, that his name has been called. He looks around. "At your feet." Éponine says as she drags herself towards him. Though she is dressed as a boy, Marius sees through her disguise immediately. He quickly kneels down next to her, surprise evident in his bright green eyes.

"Éponine? How did you get here? What are you doing?" he asks her, worry in his voice.

"I am dying." she replies. She cannot deny what she knows to be true. She is dying, she knows that she is dying. The pain is unbearable and there is so much blood. Marius is frantic.

"Oh! Are you injured? Let me carry you inside, they can dress your wounds! Where are you wounded? Is it bad! Dear God!" he exclaims. He tries to lift her and, in doing so, he touches her wounded hand. She cries out weakly. "Have I hurt you?" She nods. "But I've only touched your hand." She raises her hand into his line of sight. He sees the hole in her hand and he gasps. "What happened, 'Ponine?"

"It was pierced."

"By what?"

"A bullet."

"How?" he asks her. To his surprise, she laughs. But her laugh is weak and quiet.

"Did you not see the musket aimed at you, Monsieur?" she asks incredulously.

"Yes and a hand stopping it."

"That was mine." she tells him. He shudders, almost unable to believe that she would subject herself to that pain for him.

"What madness!" he exclaims. "But if that is all, than that is nothing. Let me carry you inside. One does not die of a pierced hand." he says. Éponine laughs again and then smiles sadly at him.

"Monsieur, the bullet went through my hand and into my chest." she sees the look of disbelief on his face. He refuses to believe that there's even a slight chance that his best friend could die.

"You will live, 'Ponine." he says. "Please, let me carry you to a room. They can dress your wounds."

"Monsieur–"

"You're going to be okay, 'Ponine."

"Marius–"

"You'll heal, and you'll live, and you'll grow up, and–"

"I'm going to die." she says, cutting him off. He looks at her, desperation in his eyes. "It's of no use to move me, Monsieur. I am dying."

"There must be some way I can help you... I can't just let you die..." his voice breaks.

"You can't save me, Monsieur, not now. But you can help me."

"How?"

"Hold me." she whispers, almost begging. Marius takes her in his arms without hesitation. Through her pain, she manages to smile at him. "There! I suffer no longer!" He tries to smile back at her, but he cannot. She is dying and, as much as he does not want to believe it, he knows that it is true. Éponine, his best friend, will die and he, Marius, can do nothing about it. He cannot save her. So he holds her, comforting her. He knows that she is scared, no matter how much she tries to hide it. Of course she is scared, she knows that she will die! Even the bravest people fear death, moreover, they fear not being alive. So yes, Éponine is scared. But she still does not regret her actions. She would rather die than let Marius die. She dies for Marius; she dies for love. Pain washes over her in waves, but she tries not to let that show on her face. She sees that Marius blames himself, she does not want to make him feel worse by showing that she is in pain. She can see the tears that have formed in Marius' eyes. She is almost surprised. _Oh! He really does care!_ she thinks, reveling in the thought. She will be missed when she dies. Marius will miss her, Marius does not want her to die. She almost feels happy, happy that he cares. But then she sees the pain in Marius' eyes. It is not the same pain that she feels, the pain that tears at her insides. No, his is the pain of loss, the pain of sorrow, the worst type of pain that there is, for there is no way to heal that type of pain. They say that time heals everything, but this is not true. Anyone who has lost a loved one will know this. Time helps, but it does not heal all. You never recover from the loss of someone close to you, it stays with you and constantly attacks your heart. You never return to normal after losing a loved one. To do so would require you to redefine normal, for after that loss you are forever changed. But, and remember this, Dear Reader, you cannot bring yourself to regret knowing the one you have lost. No matter how much pain, how much grief you endure, you will never wish that you had not known your departed loved one. You will never regret the good times spent with that person. Just as Marius could never regret knowing Éponine. He would never wish that he had not met her, even if not knowing her would have spared him the pain he now felt, the loss, the grief, the misery. He tries to think of every good memory he has had with Éponine as he holds the dying girl in his arms. But he cannot bring forth the good memories, he cannot take his mind off of what is happening now, what he will always remember: her death. He asks himself: why? Why did Éponine save him, knowing that it could result in her death, which it would. He looks at her, memorising every part of her face. Her big brown eyes with secret gold flecks that still retain the beauty of her youth, her soft-looking red lips that are the exact colour of a rose in the spring, her nose that's just a little crooked from the time that it was once broken, the dark and thick lashes that frame her beautiful eyes. She is beautiful. Maybe not to everyone, but to Marius she will always be his beautiful Éponine. Nothing can change that, not even death. Death will not change the way he remembers her. He will always remember how brave she was, how she was smart in her own way, how she could always make him laugh, how radiant she looked when she smiled. He will always remember how cunning she could be, or how witty. He will always remember her laugh. Her laugh... it is his favourite sound and is almost like music to his ears. It isn't soft and lady-like. No, her laugh is real. She does not care if it is not 'proper'. She does not laugh often, but that makes it even better. Marius loves hearing her laugh because he knows that in those rare moments that she laughs, she is happy. He knows that he will never hear that laugh again. She will dead before the sun rises again. She will not be there when tomorrow comes, she will be dead. Marius can hardly bear the thought, but he knows full well that it is true. She will be gone from this world. Still, he asks himself: why?

"'Ponine... why did you save me?" he asks her, needing to know.

"I could not let you die, Monsieur. I saw the musket aimed at you and... I could not let you die." she replies. Her voice is even weaker now, almost inaudible. She is fading fast. "It won't be long now..." she whispers. She tries to sit up, but can barely support her own weight, which was never very much to begin with. "Monsieur, I don't want to deceive you. I have, in my pocket, a letter for you. Since yesterday. I was told to deliver it, but I hid it. It's from Cosette. I'm sorry." she tells him. "And as for the wedding, I'll be absent." Convulsively, she grabs his hand with her own injured one, but she no longer seems to feel the pain. She places his hand in the pocket of her blouse, where Marius indeed feels the piece of paper. "Take it." she whispers. Marius takes the letter from her pocket. She smiles weakly and makes a sign of satisfaction and consent. "There is your letter. It's my gift a couple months in advance." She wishes that it could have been her that Marius fell in love with, but she has accepted it now. Marius will marry Cosette and she, Éponine, will die. "Now, for my pains, promise me..." she hesitates.

"Yes?"

"Promise me!"

"I promise you, Éponine. Anything, I promise."

"Kiss me on my forehead when I am dead. I'll feel it somehow." she says. Marius nods. She smiles once again and then falls back, her eyes closed. She remains immobile and then, at the moment that Marius thinks her forever asleep, she opens her eyes and looks at him with the sombre profoundness of death and then whispers to him in a voice whose sweetness already seems to belong to another world, "And then, do you know, Monsieur Marius, I believe I was a little in love with you." she tries to smile again and dies. Marius lets the tears fall from his eyes. His best friend is gone! How horrible! And... and she loved him! How could he have been so blind! How did he not see that! Now he thinks back to every moment he spent with Éponine. How did he not see what was always right in front of him!? How did he not realise until now that he loves her too! He loves her, but she is dead.

He keeps his promise and he kisses that livid forehead, still beaded with an icy sweat. Éponine is gone now. Marius is alone. He has realised his love for her when it is already too late. He can never be with her now. Oh what a life they might have known...

**I hope that was depressing enough for you. Please review!**


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